Thursday, September 27, 2007


This makes me ashamed to call Tennessee my home. Not only this... but the asinine legislature has seen fit to ignore the basis of civilized society, property rights, in favor of a do-gooder buzz from a smoking ban.

How many neighborhood bars are now in serious trouble of going out of business because they now have to declare themselves adult only if they want to allow smoking?

But hell... like the fella says... bring truck loads of illegals into the state and give them drivers license... but for the love of all that is good and holy... don't you dare bring 2 cartons of cigarettes across the border.

Monday, September 24, 2007

How Bout Dem Titans?

so as I sit here with the shit eatin'est grin you ever saw... I have to wonder... is it bragging to point out that all the players I told you to watch showed up?

Haynesworth dominated the game and single handedly caused the Saints to abandon their rushing attack. Their loan long drive and rushing TD happened when Haynesworth was on the sideline.

Keith Bulluck had a mere 3 interceptions.

Vinny Fuller had a pick 6 of his own.

Antwan Odom didn't have a sack... but he and Tavis Laboy killed their man all night long...

KVB was KVB.

Lendale White was clearly the best running back on the field. Just like he was in the Rose Bowl.

Vince had a great game... and he'll get the headlines... but this victory was all about the Titans Defense. They had a huge game.

As for me?

We're 2-1 going in to a bye. If I'd told you we'd be be 2-1 at the begining of the year... you'd have laughed in my face.

No one is laughing now.

Least of all...

The Saints.
Any Given Monday

The Prologe:

Its been almost 3 years since my beloved Titans played on Monday Night... and then it was a meaningless game against the Chiefs. The Titans were decimated by injuries and were reduced to trickery. Billy Volek and Drew Bennett actually set records for td passes. It was insane.

Ah... but tonight should be completely different.

The Preview:

This is more like it. The Titans have an atheletic offensive line with a mean-streak. Kevin Mawae is borderline dirty and David Stewart has had his fair share of personal fouls. They'll be plowing the road not for a speedster or a dancer... but a hammer.

Lendale White is a Jeff Fisher running back. He's one cut... north and south... move the pile, move the chains... cart the saftey off the field. His task is made quite a bit easier of course... because defenses have to play contain. That opens up the middle and the lanes. That's because they have to contend with...

Vince Young has been called one of the most feared players in the NFL. If you saw Bob Sanders nearly break his ankles trying to make an openfield tackle on Young then you know why. Young's legs open up the whole field. Tonight though... tonight could well be about his arm. So far the WR's main contribution has been simply to walk on the field and force someone to cover them. That takes defenders out of the middle and makes the Hammer's lanes a little wider still. Tonight may be the night the young WR corp gets to earn its stripes.

And what of the other side?

The Fire Wall:

The Titans defensive line is vicisous. At tackle they have The Devastator... Albert Haynesworth. He's been known to single handed dominate an offense so much so that the Titans coaching staff literally scraps their whole game plan. Now beside him he has a rotation of Corey Simon and Tony Brown. On the otherside of Haynesworth you'll find KVB. Kyle Vanden Bosch. He of the infinite motor. Kyle's been moved to the other side of the line this year to get him more one on one matchups. He's going against the offense's best lineman, the left tackle, but so far the switch has been productive. Kyle and Albert make a mess of things. Ask Peyton Manning. On the left side of the d-line you'll see Antwaan Odom... a speed rusher that's a lot stronger than he looks. He has a serious Jevon Kearseness about him... and he has the injury history to prove it. He's been healthy this year though... and he's been wreaking havok.

The Prophets of Doom:

The addition of Fowler at middle lineback is a huge boon. Fowler is a big hitter. He's a thug. He swallows running backs, and that frees up Bulluck to be the predator he was meant to be. Number 53 will be stalking around the middle of the field... looking for interceptions and knockout shots. On the other side you'll find Thornton... fast... solid against the run... sort of the conscience of this group. He's always where he's supposed to be.

The Sinister Secondary

Two new corners this year solidify this group. Harper and Finnegan will be the names you'll see most of the night. 1st round pick Micheal Griffin will show up as well. In the nickle Vinny Fuller comes in. Fuller is someone to keep an eye on. He's a ball hawk with a nasty burst and always seems to make something happen. Behind them you'll find the safeties... both cover... both hit. Chris Hope is the rockstar of the secondary... something tells me that by the end of the second quarter you'll know why.

And what of the Saints?

Well... I'd do a write on them... but come on... they're just another victim. They're tonights designated road kill... its like breaking down a crippled old man before his fight with a pissed of lion. There's no reason to rub it in his face.


The Preparation:

- Margaritas... check.
- Victory Cigar... check.
- Queso and chips... check.
- Corona... check.
- Titans gear... check.


DrWho's already off for her pre-game nap. Something she learned from Steve McNair. Don't complain to us about late night games. Get a power nap in early and stay up with the big dogs.

A couple hours before game time we'll fire up the pre-game meal. An hour to go... it'll be time to settle in... start the drinkin'.... arrange the snacks and insure the all necessities are in place.

T minus 30 minutes. Time to suit up. On come the jersey's and game hats. yes.... everyone.

T minus 10 minutes. We're starting to get pumped up at this point. There is chest bumbing and hand slapping. The woofing has begun.

T minus 5 minutes. Any Given Sunday goes into the DVD. Que up the Inches Speech.

Game Time... it will be bedlam just before kick off... either a quiet storm of pent up energy waiting to erupt... or stomping screaming and yelling chaos. Ya never know.

Doesn't matter.

Its Monday Night. Its the Titans and the Saints. Its Rock and Roll.

The Prediction:

Who needs one? The Titans are gonna stomp a mudhole in the Saints. Write it down.

Saturday, September 22, 2007


So... ya wonder what my wife does at work?

Friday, September 21, 2007

The Jena Six

Have any of ya been following this? Let me break it down. Outside of a school there is a tree the students call the "white tree". They call it the white tree because that's where some white kids sit.

Nice to see diversity education is working so well... but I digress.

At any rate... some black students went and asked the principle if they could sit under the tree. He laughed and told them of course they could. So they did.

The next day, some dumbass kid hung a hangman's noose over a branch of the tree. Things went down hill from there.

Irate black students ended up confronting white students... and things got bad. One white kid was beaten and kicked until he was unconscience by those now known as the Jena Six.

So... when you see pictures of the protest... remember what they are protesting.

No one is saying that white kid hit anyone. He didn't. All they are saying is how unfair it is that its only the black kids in jail. Funny... its only the black kids that beat the hell out of someone.

So as usual I ask... what could that white kid have said to justify the beating he took? "Nigger" is just a word. Its use doesn't justify homicide, or aggrevated assault. Ya don't get to kick someone until he's unconscience just because he said something you don't like... no matter how much you don't like it.

It says a lot about relations in America when a stupid tasteless prank, which should've resulted in some parents takin' some boys to the wood shed.... instead resulted in a kid in the hospital, 6 kids facing the real possibility of jail, 5 of which are actually facing attempted murder charges.

Don't dare compare this to Selma. Don't dare invoke the name of Rosa Park. Martin Luther the King would've been discusted by the actions of the Jena Six. But ya know what? All this simmering anger... it needs a spark... like anything else.

This is probably just a glorified fund raiser for Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.... but keep in mind... it is possible that its the begining of a big nasty conflict.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007


It be National Talk Like a Pirate Day me hearties! In honor of the occasion... Ye can be sartin' shore of one thing matie... Ol' Nate will be partakin' of his favourite mixed drink this very evenin'!

And what's that ye be askin'?

Why what else? says I....

Bourbon laced with gun powder!

Monday, September 17, 2007

Ill Tidings

I don't have time to explain just how bad this is... so in the interest of expediancy... thing of a boiling oil enema.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Instant Classic

".... just like your false prophet Mohammad was poisoned by one of his wives."


OBL is fond of video messages. Lets see how he likes receiving one.

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

If It Don't Say Springfield, Its Just a 1911

A few of y'all have asked me... "Why springfield?"
Well... this is the best answer I have for ya. Read this thread. Yes... its long. Yes... its worth it. Long story short?

Ducati super bike... new Springfield 1911 in a backpack... extremely high speed... backpack comes open... Bad things happen.

See pics:

So... first of all... please note.. the hammer is STILL BACK. The safety is still on. The weapon was dropped on the interstate at over 140mph... and likely got the 18 wheeler treatment... but it did NOT drop the hammer. So what else happened? Our Hapless Hero shipped it back to Springfield Armory.

They charged him 150 bucks... and sent it back to him like this:
There is no other manufacturer that could've, or would've done what Springfield did. By the way... he had it back in a matter of DAYS.
Kimber can kiss my ass.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

Its Tuesday September 11th...

and no one cares.


Big news in New York ain't necessarily big news anywhere else.

Friday, September 07, 2007

Nothing New Under the Sun

Frequently these days I here shallow thinkers speak of the possibility of the female rise to power. Some are skeptical, like Fred Reed, and wonder what such a world would be like. Others claim that if a woman were to actually rule the world, there would be all manner of utopian type progress made... less war... better healthcare... better schools... beer trees... everything you can think of.

What all of these people seem to ignore is...

We've had plenty of female world leaders.

We don't need to guess what it would be like. We know. We've seen it. We have history to look to. Lets take for example...

Queen Victoria... She was queen during the apex of British global power... which means... she ruled as much of the world as anyone ever has. And what was her reign like? Was it marked with peace and joy?

No. It was marked by bloody war. Oh certainly there was progress. The Industrial Revolution for example. But there was nothing particularly feminine about Queen Victoria's reign. In fact... it looked largely... like every other riegn... marked with greed and blood.

Throughout history we can find female dictators, queens, and world leaders. They are not unicorns... they are not mythical beings to be dreampt up and fantasized about... It makes me ill to think of all the oatmeal brains out there clasping their hands together envisioning a utopian world under female rule.

Women have been in power before. Ya know what happens?

The same thing that always happens.


And lots of fancy parties.

Monday, September 03, 2007

Stop What You're Doing

And go buy a Romeo y Julieta Dream. They are basicly the 1875 in a glass tube. Holy cow. You simply have to smoke one. I've never steered you wrong have I? You tried Bookers... You tried Makers... You even tried Woodford Reserve.

Tonight... say dusk... when you've settled in and have nothing else to do... find a front porch swing... or a comfy patio chair... light up and enjoy.

Think of it... as legal marijuana that tastes good.